American Common Touch in China

This past week, I have been reading news about Vice President Joe Biden visiting China, mostly about visiting Beijing since I am originally from there. What I enjoyed most is the reports about Joe Biden going for lunch in a local restaurant in Beijing. The place, the people, and the food were all so authentic and touching to me. Mr. Biden stepped into this everyday life of ordinary people in Beijing, and we got a chance to see it. For the last few years, we’ve heard so much about China’s economic development and its rising role in the world, but this episode of Joe Biden mingling with ordinary people in an ordinary place in Beijing captured my heart -- Americans and Chinese are getting closer and closer. We are not only talking about the big political and economic issues, but also getting connected in simple everyday life, sharing soybean paste noodles, steamed pork buns, cucumber salads…

In a Chinese report I read, Joe Biden was referred as ye ye (grandfather) introducing his sun nu (granddaughter) to China. They toured the Forbidden City and walked on the Great Wall. In the restaurant at lunch, Joe Biden was introducing his granddaughter to the Chinese: “This is my granddaughter.” His 18-year-old granddaughter Naomi has studied Chinese for 5 years. During the trip, she has been very helpful to her grandfather with translation of Chinese.

Someday, I would like to introduce China to my children and show them around in Beijing. But I know I need to put in the effort now. They need to learn Chinese and get to know the culture. I am sure if you want to introduce your children to China someday, you would want them to learn Chinese now.

THE CHINESE CONCEPTION OF TIME

Last night I was helping my son with his Chinese homework. The subject was time, e.g. last month, this month, next month, yesterday, today, tomorrow, past and future, etc.

To explain time, I drew an axis. In English, time is coming towards us from the front as if we are facing upriver. In Chinese, we face the past, as if looking downriver, since the past is visible to us, but the future is not yet visible. Yesterday came in front of Today, and Tomorrow will come after Today. Therefore in Chinese, we say the past is “in front” of the future which is coming “afterward”.

In my family it is no surprise that we see things from two different points of view. Anyway, China has a long history so there is a lot to see in the past.

Green Eggs and Ham 绿鸡蛋和火腿

After a long winter, we started our Chinese classes for Spring 2011. Yesterday before Easter Sunday at the children’s class, we reviewed the sentence patterns for to eat, to drink, and like to eat, like to drink, etc. The children conversed with each other using the sentence patterns with different vocabulary, e.g. "What do you eat?" "I eat carrots." “Do you like to eat onions?” “I don’t like to eat onions.” “I like to eat potatoes.” Then I moved on to teach them how to indicate the past, present, and future, e.g. yesterday, today, and tomorrow. To make the sentence drill more fun, we practiced on saying what each of us would eat and drink on the next day, Easter Sunday. Since many of us would have ham for Easter dinner, I told everyone that the Chinese phrase for ham is “fire leg”. This reminded them that the Chinese for turkey is “fire chicken”. Now with the Easter bunny jumping around in their heads, the kids got very creative. They started to put the words they have learned together to say “Tomorrow I will eat a Chocolate Rabbit.” “Do you like to eat Green Eggs and Ham?”

“Are we doing Dr. Seuss in Chinese?” one student asked.

Later I googled on Green Eggs and Ham and found this website on chinesepod.com/lessons/chinese-green-eggs-and-ham. It sounds like a fun lesson. You may want to listen to it when you get a chance.

Here are more Chinese translations from this Dr. Seuss rhyme:

——你喜欢吃绿蛋和火腿吗？ ——你喜欢在这里吃或者那里吃吗？ ——你喜欢在房子里吃或者和老鼠一起吃吗？ ——你喜欢在盒子里吃或者和狐狸一起吃吗？ ——你喜欢在船上吃或者和山羊一起吃吗？ --山姆是我

I hope you had a wonderful Easter dinner today with your family and you liked everything you ate.

Thoughts on Chinese Tiger Mother

Last Saturday I read the article on WSJ “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior” and immediately shared it on my Facebook page. I then had a discussion with a friend of mine who is a psychologist teaching parenting skills. She stated: “A middle approach is helpful: no name-calling and being supportive but not timid - and expecting the best!”

Below is my email sharing my thoughts with her.

Thanks for your comments. I agree that somewhere in the middle --not the extremes (between the Chinese Way and the Western Way) should be the way to go. It also has to be adjusted to different children.

My older one is very intelligent, but laid back, easy going. When he was little, I didn't demand too much from him academically and hoped he would develop at his own pace. I just didn't know if I should push him too much academically at a young age. I was more interested in seeing where his interests were and what he was naturally good at. Now he is a freshman in high school and I certainly see he is still working on strict self-discipline to get high grades although he got into the honor program at St. John's Prep with his high SSAT scores and enjoys his classes. I can't use Amy Chua's method on him now since he is a teenager, but I often tell him that he needs to work hard and be self-motivated. I think he understands it but doesn't have the discipline and the habit to do it consistently yet. It will be a process and I hope he can get it before he goes to college.

My younger son is different. He handles his homework mostly by himself without much reminding. He is more of a perfectionist and very competitive, but can be insecure and anxious sometimes. I spent a lot of time working on his social and emotional development instead of academic development which most Chinese parents don't necessarily think is a big deal, believing that a child will grow and mature on his own.

From the article, I see Amy Chua describes the Chinese culture of raising children very true and clear although a little extreme in her own way. I am not for her extreme methods. But I was raised to live up to my parents' high academic and professional expectations well into my adulthood. From 4th grade, my parents expected me to get 100 points in all subjects. My grandma lived with us and together with my parents, they wouldn't let me do any house chores. As my grandma said, I was raised "to open my mouth when food is served and stretch out my arms when clothes are put on". I scored high in the national college entrance exam and got into the top university of China, which at the time had an over 80% male student body, with a major in computer technology and engineering chosen by my mother. When I had my children in the US, my parents came to help me out. My Mom said that she would help me with child care so that I could advance my career. It was a totally different way of spoiling and demanding of offspring.

To raise my own children, I constantly feel the differences between the Chinese Way and the Western Way. I share a lot of the Chinese cultural values and beliefs that Amy Chua described, but I’m not always certain of the best way to carry them out in raising my boys in America. My mother-in-law often reminds me that I am living in America and that is not what Americans do. My husband tells me that there is no one way to do things here in America. Right, but we have to establish a Wang-Bedell Way as I told him. My husband has lots of intellectual interests. He is a very tolerant person and enjoys playing with our children. I prefer more structured routines, staying focused and setting high expectations for my children, while my husband doesn't always take strict stands. Children sense the difference and get by as much as they can. Or they maybe just get confused and try to figure out what to do. As a result, we don't get to extremes, but I am not sure if we can raise our children to reach their highest potential as I hope.

Parenting is very challenging, yet is very rewarding. I am committed to this journey of trial and error to establish our Wang-Bedell Way to raise our two sons.

All Saints Day--Ten Thousand Saints Holiday 万圣节 (wàn shèng jié)

Last Saturday a student walked into our class wearing a zombie costume. It was Halloween weekend in Salem again. I tried to come up with a Chinese term for zombie. “What is a zombie?” I asked. Don’t laugh at me. I grew up in Beijing and didn’t have all of that Halloween stuff in my childhood. My son told me: “It’s the living dead.” I thought about the term “dead body” 死尸 (sǐ shī), but it is not quite the “living dead”. Then I thought of the term of “raising the dead to life” -- 起死回生 (qǐ sǐ huí shēng). The children took that term. I had them write down the characters for “life” -- 生 and “death” -- 死, thinking they are very important words. Enough of Halloween, then we moved on to All Saints Day. In Chinese it’s “Ten Thousand Saints Holiday” -- 万圣节 (wàn shèng jié).

We have counted the numbers from 0, 1 to 100. That day, we learned all those big numbers, 999; 1000; 9,999; 10,000; 99,999; 100,000; 999,999; 1,000,000; 9,999,999; 10,000,000; 99,999,999; 100,000,000; 1,300,000,000 (the population of China). Then a student asked how to say fractions in Chinese. We learned how to say pi: 3.1415926…

It was fun to learn all those big numbers. However the word 10,000 万 (wàn) is a special word. I said that word almost every day in my elementary school in Beijing by chanting: Long Live Chairman Mao -- Ten Thousand Years of Chairman Mao -- 毛主席万岁 (máo zhǔ xí wàn suì) !　Long Long Live Chairman Mao -- Ten Thousand of Ten Thousand Years of Chairman Mao -- 毛主席万万岁 (máo zhǔ xí wàn wàn suì) !

But today we learned the word 万 (wàn) is used for saints, both living and deceased, on All Saints Day.

Technology Innovation -- U.S. and China Together to Create the Future

On Saturday September 18, a beautiful autumn day, I arrived early in Kendall Square, Cambridge. I was attending the U.S.-China Technology Innovation Forum, jointly organized by the Massachusetts Office of International Trade & Investment (MOITI), the China Chamber of Commerce for Import & Export of Machinery & Electronic Products (CCCME), and the United States Information Technology Office (USITO).

As I walked into the salon in the Marriot Hotel, I saw a big banner up in front of the room with both Chinese and English. On the left, there were three flags – of the U.S., China, and Massachusetts. On the right, there was a big projection screen, again with Chinese and English. After I found a table, a man with a box of audio head phones came over and asked me if I needed one for the translation. I thanked him and told him that it was not necessary since I was fluent in both Chinese and English.

Listening to Dr. Ted Carr, Executive Director of MOITI, and Mr. Wang Chao, Vice Minister of Commerce of P.R. China, I started to understand their message: both the U.S. and China hope to create a future through technology innovation. Both countries would like to work together on this mission. As I listened to the following speakers, my mind went back to my days in China.

When I was in high school, we had a mantra: “Study and master math, physics, and chemistry, then you can go anywhere under the sun.” I was a true believer in that. Diving into math and science, I applied to study computer science and engineering at Tsinghua University (the MIT of China). After graduation, I worked on campus developing software for an American company. I also participated in an international technology conference where IBM, Xerox, and Apple along with other international companies came to Beijing to show their high tech to the Chinese. Later, I came to the U.S. for graduate study in computer science. After earning a Master’s degree in CSE, I started my career in the U.S. as a software engineer. It was technology that led me from China to the U.S. and from past to present.

Now, seeing and listening to Americans and Chinese talk about creating a future together through technology innovation, I was moved, excited, and inspired. I would like to keep contributing, connecting Americans and Chinese to create a better and brighter future for all of us.

Antique Car or Grandfather Car? 古董车 (gǔ dǒng chē) 还是 老爷车 (lǎo yé chē)?

As China has become the second largest economic power in the world after the US, we have heard that automobile sales are going well in China. Millions of people enjoy driving and the ownership of private cars. This is such a contrast from the days when I was in Beijing. Since I never liked the public bus that much, I always preferred to ride my bicycle. I rode to high school every day for my senior year. Then I rode between my home in the southeast corner of the city and Tsinghua University in the northwest corner of the city for seven years. Sometimes, I rode through the center of the city along Eternal Peach Avenue; other times, I rode along the third ring road. I rode in all weather--sun, rain, or snow. Each way could easily take 2 to 3 hours. I guess no one would do that anymore unless he/she were training for the Tour de France.

Well even then, I knew cars. Although there were no privately owned cars as I knew, there were some cars owned by the government. We call cars 小汽车 (xiǎo chì chē). However, I didn’t know anything about antique cars or classic cars until I came to the US.

Today when I was helping a friend to practice her Mandarin Chinese, she told me that the Chinese now start to learn about and appreciate antique cars and classic cars. The world’s top antique car auction companies are looking into the Asian market as well. As we practiced in Mandarin, my friend asked me how to say antique cars or classic cars in Chinese. I told her 古董车 (gǔ dǒng chē) or 经碘车 (jīng diǎn chē). I actually have never heard anyone talk about them in Mandarin, but I know 古董 (gǔ dǒng) is for antique as in antique painting, furniture, or other object, and 车(chē ) is for car. 经碘 (jīng diǎn) is for classic as in classic literature. After I got home I checked the Google translator for antique car and classic car. It verified my translation of antique car 古董车 (gǔ dǒng chē), but it translated classic car to 老爷车 (lǎo yé chē). 老爷(lǎo yé) means grandfather. So I thought: oh…Google thinks classic car is grandfather car like a grandfather clock. Hmm…I am not sure if that is a good way to see it.

At the end of our lesson, my friend introduced me to her husband Don Rose. He turns out to be the classic car specialist for RM Auctions, which will offer James Bond’s Aston Martin--“the world’s most famous car”--at its annual auction next month in London. Next Monday morning The Today Show on NBC will have “Don Rose with the Bond Car!” Would you call this Bond Car 老爷车--a grandfather car?